Danni 

“Everyone has their own time clock in their life. Trust the timings of your clock”.

People judge you on how long you’ve been separated before dating again. People judge you on how quickly things move but if it feels right time doesn’t matter.

The first meet up was in May, 31^st May to be precise. There’d been a little chatting online after meeting on a dating app but he wasn’t interested in using the phone to get to know someone so it was agreed to meet up for a drink. Three months later they arrange to meet up in Bologna, Italy. Fast forward 2 years and the relationship continues to blossom.

She had been separated officially for a year (longer if you consider the time it took to make that final decision), settled in her unit and ready to hit the dating scene again. At the same time her dream to celebrate her 60^th in Italy – a place very close to her heart was falling into place. The dream extended to meeting up with her son and her sister and respective partners in a city called Trieste. A beautiful city in northern Italy where her mum grew up. She also had a goal to use that trip to find out if she could travel solo. 

But in May of that big adventurous year things started changing. She met him online. When he mentioned his favourite restaurant was right around the corner from where she was living she got nervous that it was too close to home and tried to ignore him. At the same time, he said that he was about to go away to a Blues festival interstate for a couple of weeks. So she thought “oh well another man full of empty promises”. But he was not one of those men. When he returned he contacted her and she agreed to have a drink with him. Continuing to look for red flags it didn’t help that he kept changing the time to meet but luckily, she just went with the flow. That first meeting was so easy. They connected on so many different things from their Italian background, their love of dancing and music and the outdoors. They even worked out they’d been living very close to each other in their previous relationships. Most importantly they were both looking for someone to go on adventures and do fun things in what they considered to be the prime of their life. She could tell straight away he was just a genuine, kind, thoughtful, funny man. His message the next day was “will we be having a first date? I only ask as I have made my dating account inactive. I won’t need to see anyone else if we continue our new journey”. 

The adventures started. It started with a drink date, then a dinner date, then their Park Run together all in the first week.  There were so many fun times in the months that followed and he was so proactive with ideas and organising tickets and making the plans. It was so easy to go along for the ride and feeling like it was all too good to be true. But each time they met her fears would melt away. You see she had been hurt in the past and it caused her to constantly be on the look out for red flags. No one had ever spoken to her in such a loving thoughtful way. She had never felt so loved and cared for. She truly felt like she could just be herself and he loved her just the way she was. She was never a makeup kind of girl and he liked that about her. He only met her mum on 2 occasions while she was in a nursing home bed bound but he connected with her in such a way that made her heart explode. He spoke to her mum in Italian and to bring lightness they played her mums favourite Italian music at which time her mum encouraged them both to dance for her with the biggest smile on her face.

Soon enough the talks turned to her trip to Italy. In her mind she could easily visualize how much fun they could have. But she was worried about what people would think about going overseas with a man after only having known him a short time. But it did not feel like a short time to her. It had felt like they had known each other way longer. She kept going back and forth about asking him to meet her there. Everything had been booked in advance. Her son and sister would meet her in Trieste the day before her birthday. She knew for sure she wanted to keep that time as planned. She was so very grateful that her family were prepared to plan their travels around her and her milestone birthday and did not want to change anything that might take away from that. But she couldn’t pretend any more that she didn’t want her new beau to share part of this trip with her so she bit the bullet and asked him to meet her in Bologna. Of course he jumped at the opportunity and booked his flights pronto. She still wanted to have a few days solo travel before he arrived. But after the wonderful celebrations in Trieste she was on such a high that she struggled to fully embrace a few days to herself. Bologna is such a magical city that she was desparate to share the wonder of the city with someone. She decided right then that solo travel wasn’t for her. While she enjoyed wandering the streets and shopping she was counting down the days to his arrival. They had been facetiming each morning and night and were as excited as each other.

She was getting ready to make her way to Bologna station to meet him and messaged her best friend to get advice on what she should wear. The white linen dress she bought in Trieste and the pink sandals and handbag she bought in Bologna were perfect. It was warm and it was a 20 minute walk from her hotel to the station.

She watched as his train pulled in to the platform and nervously sought him out. And in his usual style she found him hiding behind a pylon. They embraced and the rest of that trip was unforgettable. They spent 4 days in Cinque Terre where they swam, drank Aperol Spritz, took boat trips, tasted amazing food. The highlight being the walk from one town to the other and dancing half way along the route to music being played by a man on the piano accordion. Then a few days in Lucca enjoying a day trip to Pisa. Then with a hire car they made their way to Lake Iseo and then Venice. It was in Venice she had organized a few surprises for his birthday. Yes, their birthdays are in the same month. She had pre purchased tickets to a concert knowing how much he loved music and a magical dinner at Cip’s club with views across St Mark’s square. The trip finished in Venice with a magical sunset cruise. 

In less than 2 years there’s been concerts, musicals, picnics, hikes, comedy shows, salsa dancing, moonlight cinemas, and weekend getaways and so much more.

While there’s been many adventures in this short time their latest project involves a Supermarket delivery van (they call her Molly) that they are turning into a motor home. He is very good with anything he puts his hands to and loving the project and she is loving being his apprentice and helping with aesthetics. It is still work in progress but they have already had many fun nights sitting under their awning or sitting by a fire drinking and eating with good friends and family alike. It’s a constant reminder of all the adventures they have yet to go on. There’s a plan to take Molly to Broken Hill to attend the Mundi Mundi festival where all their love of travel, music and friends merge.

Life with her new beau is full of surprises, love, laughter and joy and she is glad she didn’t allow people’s judgements to cloud her decisions along the way. If it feels right time doesn’t matter. And we all know we don’t know how much time we have left so let’s make the most of the time we have.

Copyright Danni, May 2025. All rights reserved; this intellectual property belongs solely to Danni.

About Danni 

I don’t consider myself a writer, but I believe we all have stories to share. I couldn’t help but be inspired to try this thing called “writing” as I watch Cathy’s dream unfold in creating this space and sharing her love of writing. My background is in administration and a job I think I do well. After all, every organization needs someone to make sure tasks are completed on time and in line with rules and regulations. I’m a stickler for crossing my t’s and dotting my i’s. But being creative in any way, be it playing with mosaics, handcrafting cards, knitting, gardening or reading is where I can get lost in time and doesn’t that tie in nicely with my first story?