The Real Tortured Poets Department

Eve Stephenson

LISTEN TO EVE READ ‘THE REAL TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT:

Eve Stephenson Reads ‘The Real Tortured Poets Department’

How to romanticise your life as a single Mum in the suburbs – no.8:

Gather together all the cheap-arse Dusk candles (and shreds of sanity) you can find.

Armed with a half-empty box of Redheads, dramatically strike a match against the ignition panel (several times with increasing frustration until it catches).

With deliberate divinity, light as many short pillars as possible, before the flame singes your thumb and forefinger; at which point you scream at the night for mercy – and a trusty ol’ Bic lighter.

Swoon at your replica turn-of-the-century desk, writing cringey, erotic fiction with a leaky fountain pen ’til the sun comes up…or prior, should the ghastly call of a Curlew startle you, causing the inkwell to be knocked over.

Stare into the darkness enveloping your hard-written spicy poetry, while contemplating school lunches for the day.

…Because nothing says ‘tortured poet’ like a sticky black banana.

ABOUT EVE STEPHENSON

Lover of people and their stories; mother of wild creatures; and writer of weirdly wonderful tales.

Brisbane, Queensland.

Instagram @evielou81

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